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You are in... Forums > CAR feedback > CAR Online > Ask Batty

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Batty

Joined:

Mar 08

Posts: 4885

Batty says:

Ask Batty

I have been away and wandering, oh the things I have seen! What a beautiful world there is out there, such professionalism and graphic wonder! Why, there was even animated avatars!

But I have returned dear forum members and I have decided to allow my conceited personality to fulfil its latent ambition for fame and favour. Since starting a blog would require funding and pictures etc (yours is lovely supercarrambler), and considering the tiny amount of influence and interest the CAR staff have with the forum (except Tim) I am taking over a corner for myself. So here we have it: the Ask Batty thread. (Also you have been too quiet when I haven't been here, and since I can't get any public recognition from CAR Online for what I put in, I don't care if they throw me off!)

I am mystic, I am wise, I all knowing and all seeing. I can solve all your emotional, social and ecological problems and I can fix your front tap. I am also unfailingly modest. Here are some testimonials from some members you may know.

 

" I was a shy and bashful man until Batty helped me. Without him I would be a Brown boy and still be living with Mum. Thanks Batty...." JohnnyBimmer

"I couldn't spell before Batty set me straight on cras" Joedodgy

"I was a dentist's horse slave until Batty freed me from my shackles..." Robby1977

"I couldn't swim, so Batty threw me in. Now I have to wash myself with a rag. There is still a legal action pending, so I can't say anything bad..." ga41

"I'm French" livc44411.

"lokinen" lokinen

Just some of the miracle turn arounds I have performed. You know where I am, you can trust my hands, let me heal you, help you or perhaps conceal you.

The more you write, the more likely my staff badge will appear. Help me to help you which will help me.

[This Topic has been modified by the Author]

Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha.

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 08:18)
car4mh

Joined:

Dec 06

Posts: 1803

car4mh says:

Re: Ask Batty

 thus ended the walkabout...enter, the guru!  

lokinen, now our Aussie icon has returned, you can take off the Dame Edna mask and put your anorak back on!

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 09:16)
lokinen

Joined:

Aug 06

Posts: 2262

lokinen says:

Re: Ask Batty

car4mh said:

 thus ended the walkabout...enter, the guru!  

lokinen, now our Aussie icon has returned, you can take off the Dame Edna mask and put your anorak back on!


Thank god for that .

Batty, my missed friend. For me,whilst recognition from Car is nice(any  is nice) it is for me far more important to recieve recognition for work well done from my fellow Forumers.That is why your thanks this week slot is so popular amongst us all.I've been doing the motoring forum thing since 2002 and there are always one or two members whose status rises above others and whom others would love to emulate.Often these forum stars stay as regular members not wishing to take on responsibilites and consequently have to consider everything they say.

For me you have managed to create an envialble position on here and i'm glad you have returned to it 

Beep Beep

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 11:09)
ga41

Joined:

Apr 07

Posts: 2942

ga41 says:

Re: Ask Batty

Mate it is great to have you back.

Perhaps this time you are here to stay. This forum wouldnt be the same without our eccentric resident Aussie.

Welcome back Mark.

- http://www.freerice.com/ For each answer you get right, they will donate 10 grains of rice to the United Nations World Food Program -

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 12:25)
Batty

Joined:

Mar 08

Posts: 4885

Batty says:

Re: Ask Batty

 

Thank you all, very kind and I appreciate the comments. Mark, I'm not indigenous but the walkabout concept has a great deal of merit. Guru? It appeals to me rampant ego enough, I will strive to merit the tag.

Good points Reg, but I was told I wasn't an "obvious" choice on the forum (and this time I'm not muckng around). And thank God you rid yourself of Dame Edna; I think you may be as off beat as me!

Funny thing eccentricity, you spin around an axis yet some times you are further away and others closer, but still spinning about the same central axis. So good description Giannis.

OK, I am running a contra survey, lets call it the CAR Forum survey (which has a good statistical base of 20K members) about what is the most over-rated hot hatch of all time. I will not confine your options as the front page has, feel free to opine away and I will post our results on the main page when their competition closes.

Get posting and have your say!

Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha.

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 20:17)
ga41

Joined:

Apr 07

Posts: 2942

ga41 says:

Re: Ask Batty

Havent driven any supposedly iconic hot hatches to judge fairly so i'll give this one a pass. Ask me again in oh.. i dont know 5-10 years?

- http://www.freerice.com/ For each answer you get right, they will donate 10 grains of rice to the United Nations World Food Program -

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 20:50)
Robby1977

Joined:

Jan 08

Posts: 1679

Robby1977 says:

Re: Ask Batty

The Escort RS Turbo. What a bag of sh1t!!

Not particularly fast, dire handling, dreadful brakes (drums on the rear no less) badly built (they usually leaked) unreliable & rust prone. The one good thing about them is they had standard Recarro's

& don't start me on the owners! (who have now defected to old shape Evo's)

Burn the lot of them!

They say that a dog is mans best friend. This simple experiment proves this. Lock your missus and your dog in the boot of your car. Return to let them out after an hour and see which one is most pleased to see you....

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 21:13)
Batty

Joined:

Mar 08

Posts: 4885

Batty says:

Re: Ask Batty

No no no no! That's not the spirit at all ga41, far too sensible! Go with your inner child, listen to it, nuture it and let it guide you. Or, toss all that away and go for the comedy vote.

I vote for the SAAB 99 turbo.

So at the moment it is the most over-rated hot hatch of all time! Wow, surveys are powerful things.

Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha.

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 21:14)
Robby1977

Joined:

Jan 08

Posts: 1679

Robby1977 says:

Re: Ask Batty

On Car Online that it is indeed! I must stop banging my head against a brick wall on that thread - getting towards Johnny Bimmer levels of relentlessness on the subject!

any how Mark - I thought you thought the 99 uber cool??

[This Reply has been modified by the Author]

They say that a dog is mans best friend. This simple experiment proves this. Lock your missus and your dog in the boot of your car. Return to let them out after an hour and see which one is most pleased to see you....

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 21:21)
Batty

Joined:

Mar 08

Posts: 4885

Batty says:

Re: Ask Batty

No, Integrale for me!

I think it was Reg who liked the 99. Maybe he tipped them off on the SAAB website? Ooohh he would be in for uch a slap from you if that was the case! Keep on your crusade Robby, you speak for us all mate, all those one post wonders. Or perhaps they are SAMBAs? Spamming SAABists?

So now, we have a tie between the Escort Cosworth and the SAAB 99 turbo.

Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha.

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 21:30)
Robby1977

Joined:

Jan 08

Posts: 1679

Robby1977 says:

Re: Ask Batty

Ewww no, the Cossie is a machine & a half! (even if a cash cow!) A late friend of mine once owned one of the most powerful & fastest Escort Cossies in the UK. It was approaching 600bhp, god knows on the speed figures but the fastest thing I've ever been in - & I've had a play in a Murcielago. A very special car still.

Thats it, it's Regs fault! (either that or the Swedish news at 10 tipped them off about the poll!)

Bunch of nobs

 

They say that a dog is mans best friend. This simple experiment proves this. Lock your missus and your dog in the boot of your car. Return to let them out after an hour and see which one is most pleased to see you....

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  • Posted 5 years ago (24 January 2009 21:42)
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