We’ve got a nippy, sharp model in the range, but we’re going racing in one of… THESE? What were they thinking?
By Chris Chilton
1. Mercedes SLC
Apart from Penelope Pitstop’s Compact Pussycat, has any other car managed to combine such an effete road presence with proper competition aspirations as the late 1970s Mercedes SL? While the cabrio was whisking Stefanie Powers around LA in Hart to Hart, its coupe cousin was slogging its way incongruously across Africa to WRC glory.
2. Rolls-Royce Corniche
The result of a wager over dinner to enter the ’81 Paris-Dakar in a Rolls, it was scratch built around a new chassis clothed in a polyester body. Power came from a Chevy V8 driving Land Crusier axles at either end through a four-speed manual Toyota ’box. Less wine next time, chaps?
3. Dacia Duster
The perfect machine for Romanian farmers in a serious hurry to market, this one-off Pikes Peak Duster was stuffed full of Nissan GT-R motor mounted behind the seats and tuned to 850bhp, and topped off by an aero kit that included a replica of the Wright Flyer glued to the back window. It managed an impressive third at this year’s event.
4. Volvo 343
Another pensioner-mobile turned competition hero, the dumpy Volvo’s ace up its sleeve (probably next to a bit of crumpled tissue) was having its gearbox slung over the rear wheels for even weight distribution and great traction. It won the 1980 Rallycross championship and nearly spawned a Group B rally effort. Nearly.
5. Volvo 850 Estate
Hang on mate, you can’t bring your tow car onto the track! Park it in the paddock with your trailer! Volvo’s TWR team generated some great PR when it stuck an 850 wagon on the BTCC grid in 1994, minus dog or garden rubbish. Regs allowing spoilers on saloons for the following year killed it off at the season’s end.
6. VW Iltis
VW’s answer to a Defender beat Merc’s G-wagen to win a lucrative German government defence contract. But the type 183’s 1980 Paris-Dakar win was an even bigger surprise. That’s not the only competition connection though – Audi’s Quattro was based on Iltis running gear.
7. Ford Galaxie
Adopts Pathé newsreel voice: ‘And the number six Galaxie starts from row two – or is it three?’ The humungous two-door coupe was so long it could have been on both, making it an unlikely star against agile Minis and Anglias on twisty UK tracks. But Jack Sears wrestled one to glory in the 1963 British Saloon Car Championship.
8. Citroen 2CV
Is this the parade lap? No, they’re actually flat-out. They might be short on power, but 2CV races don’t lack excitement, their meagre performance meaning the cars run tighter. Tin snail sales ended in 1990, the year after the UK one-make series began, but the racing is still going strong. Laps timed with a sun-dial.
9. Jag MkVII
Mention Monte Carlo Rally and you think of Minis rushing through the snow to finish before their floorpans disintegrate in a haze of ferrous oxide – not a Jag limo that looks like it ought to be taking the Queen Mother to bridge night. But its lusty ohc straight six helped Jag’s leviathan MkVII to first place in the 1956 event.
10. Chevrolet Cruze
Who’d have thought that a conveyance even What Car? condemns for being boring would make such a mega touring car? BTCC and WTCC champ in 2010. The question remains: have any likely Chevy buyers noticed? Hello?