Vauxhall Insignia 2.8 V6 4x4 (2008) CAR review

Twenty minutes into a vigorous hoon in this 2.8-litre V6 powered, four-wheel drive flagship of the new Vauxhall Insignia range, all I could think of was pub grub.

No, the launch proceedings food was perfectly fine, thank you… after a plenty-of-added-Austrian-lard fashion. It simply struck me that, these days, there’s a surprising parity between tavern nosh and this much diminished yet still significant repmobile segment in the UK…

Aren't you supposed to be reviewing the new Vauxhall Insignia, not thinking about your stomach?

Bear with me. Time was, a sandwich with crusts already curling like the toes of any sentient being forced to watch Big Brother for the first time was the best you could either expect, or find, in the average boozer. Interrupt a road trip today in search of simple sustenance, however, and you’re just as likely to stroll into some gastronomic hot-spot serving slices of giant South American high-altitude rodent 'nestling' in a bed of raw, chainsaw-diced Caribbean vegetables 'drizzled' with an entirely suspect 'jus' or, worse, a fungi tainted 'foam' boasting all the visual appeal of cuckoo spit.

Don’t get me wrong. Unlike those few disgruntled regulars who remain huddled at the blatantly residual 'bar' bemoaning the good old days, I’m not advocating a return to the gluten-fest which glides down the gullet with the alacrity of a monkey-wrench wedged in the neck of an ostrich. I’m merely suggesting that I’d invariably be far happier to pay somewhat less for a really good, back-to-basics, home-made pie ‘n’ chips.

And all this has exactly what to do with a new Vauxhall?

My point is that you can buy a perfectly wholesome 1.8-litre Insignia for a whisker under £16,000 yet, drizzled, nestled and foamed senseless with all the technological top-dressing of gastropub excess, this car comes in at a whopping £28,885.

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