When the economy is in the same state as Keith Richards after an all-night bender, we become all sensible-shoes and buy practical over posh. That’s my theory, anyway. It is supported by car sales. The big dippers, in 2008, include Porsche (down 30 percent), Aston Martin (down 28 percent) and Bentley (down 25 percent). Nobody buys these cars for logical reasons. They are ornaments in a world that has suddenly put utility first.
So I made a list of my four favourite large ‘utility’ cars and – lo and behold – all are experiencing growing sales. They are not cheap, nor especially economical. Generally, they compete in segments whose overall sales are sliding faster than sterling.
My first favourite utility vehicle is the Land Rover Defender. At 60 – its birthday was in April – this is also the oldest ‘new’ car on Britain’s roads. But while sales of most 4x4s sink quicker than a Hummer in Lake Huron, the old stager just keeps getting more popular. This is because it is totally without pretension. And, in its own limited sphere of excellence – lugging capacity and off-road capability – it is without peer.
Favourite vehicles number two and three are both estates. Estate cars these days – with all the new-fangled crossovers and MPVs – seem a bit like wooden toys in a playroom full of PS3s. But my two favourites – the Mercedes E-class and Volvo V70 – do not pretend to be sporty or stylish. They lug loads and carry people comfortably. The best of the lower-line E-classes, the E220 estate, has seen sales jump by 13 percent this year. Bigger flasher Es – their purity ruined by bodykits and unnecessarily gluttonous engines and endless cabin fripperies – do not fare so well. Nor does Mercedes in general (sales down over seven percent).
Sensible-shoes Volvo is enjoying a sales renaissance – up 13 percent this year – and leading the charge is the V70, a car that doesn’t have a single pretentious gene in its safety-cage strengthened Swedish body. It’s no beauty and is makes no claims to being a ‘lifestyle’ estate (euphemism for load- and people-carrying capacity ruined by racy lines). It unashamedly puts comfort over sportiness, the only premium estate (apart from the Benz E) that seems designed more for the North Circular than the Nürburgring.
My final member of the Functional Four is the Citroën C4 Picasso. I have chosen this over other MPVs because it puts maximum focus on space and versatility. If you want to play Fangio when driving the family, buy a Ford S-Max. If you want to buy big and posh, buy an Espace. But if you want value and practicality, go for the C4 Picasso. Compact MPV sales crash. But the C4 Picasso’s sales are up over 22 percent. I just wish it didn’t have such a pretentious name.
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